lift me up

This was inspired by Kate Voegele's song "Lift Me Up" and I chose to name this blog by the same name. so enjoy...

Frustration

"This road is anything but simple, twisted like a riddle, I've seen haihg and I've seen low. So loud, the voices over my doubt, telling me to give up, to pack up and leave town"

Life couldn't have been worse for me than it is now. I'm not angry, I'm just disappointed.First, I lost my dad. It wasn't like he was old or even had the permission to die, but the cancer hit him at the wrong time and took him before I even had the chance to blink or process it. It was difficult, but I guess I couldn't stop living.

Then I lost my best friend. He didn't die, he just walked out of my life after asking me out and I ignorantly said "No". It wasn't like I didn't like him enough to date him, but I just loved our friendship and I knew it was going to be the end of our friendship if we atached any other thing to it. I stillbelieve I made the right choice, but I somehow wish I had made the wrong decision and pushed the other problems to a later date, but now, he's gone and I can't change that.

As if that wasn't enough, things got really bad at home.There were times when the only thing left to eat in the house was cereal and we'll all share it- my mom, my brother and I- until some form of miracle happened and we got money or maybe even food.

Here comes hope

"Even so, I had to believe, impossible means nothing to me...I've been given hope, that there's a light on up the hall"

Well, that's quite true. My mom just kept believing. Her faith was so strong that I was having a hard time catching up. I knew I needed to catch the enthusiasm, but it was so difficult. Why?

Disappointment just refused to go

"Somewhere, everybody starts there. I'm counting on a small prayer lost in a nightmare"

I wasn't doing well at school for obvious reasons. My gradeswere dropping by the day. No matter how hard I tried, Icouldn't get past average. My brother got an admission, but couldn't get a scholarship for his degree. We had to find a means of getting the money fast because time was running out and he really wanted to study. Just at that moment, all our invesements started to crumble because of the economic meltdown.

Hope Hope Again or a reason to keep living?

"But I'm here, and suddenly it's so clear, the struggle through the long years...But everything that's worth having comes with trials worth withstanding"

That's it. I have caught the 'hope syndrome'. I believe that it's all going to be better, and just to boost my hopes, my dad's old friend suddenly gave us money to help my brother out. I got a job that was payiing enought o make me less dependent on my mom and yes, my mom is doing very well and to crown it up, my result improved this time around. It could get better, but with my past results, this is really good. It gives me hope that we are coming out of this era.

My Prayer

"Down and out is overrated and I need to be elevated. Looking up is not enough, no, I would rather rise above. Can you lift me up? Turn the ashes into flames, and I have overcome, more than words can ever say. I've been given hope that there's a light up on he hall and a day will come when the fight is won and I think that day has just begun."

I really pray that things stay good and keep getting better. I really want my mom to be happy and stay happy.

I don't know if I'm asking for too much, but I wish my prayers will be answered in more ways than one.

Finally!!! Here comes joy.

Stay tuned!!!